Chet and Annie's Much Better Pokémon Adventure (We Still Love Jakey)
by Not Piteous
Summary: A lot of things happened after the incident, but those aren't really important. Let's see if Annie has any better luck as Chet's partner in the Hoenn region. Good luck to her, and our condolences go out to Jakey's friends and family.
1. Prologue

I don't know why I found it so enticing, the sight of her petite little frame balancing precariously on the edge of the ship's bow. It's still a little weird seeing her out of that old hoodie that she always wore, but she keeps much the same appeal, now dressed like a Keckleon with her cutest of faces poking out of creature's mouth. She started wearing pants again, but I again I can't see them with her new hoodie stretching just over the ends of her shorts. The sun-kissed brown of her skin fit perfectly with the summery ocean scene as we near our destination.

"Annie, aren't you even a wee bit hot in that?" I asked, wondering how a Kanto native could stand this sort of heat in an outfit like the one she's wearing. I myself had to strip down to more sensible clothes, though the feel of a button up shirt and nothing underneath is something I just don't feel comfortable in "Annie?"

She couldn't hear me. Her ears were filled with sounds of the sea as our ship tore through the ocean waves.

"That's right. You said you've never been out to sea like this." I say as I try to remember my first voyage to a region as far from home as we now sail. "It's different from the trip between Kanto and Johto, isn't it?"

Annie looked back at me with a smile on her face and a shimmer in her eyes. "Mr. Chet, look out there!" She yelled excitedly as she pointed towards a school of fishy Pokémon that raced along side the ship, leaping out of the water here and there at incongruous intervals. "I've never seen Pokémon like those before!" Said Annie, whose healthy excitement pushed her closer and closer to the edge of the ship.

"Those are Carvanah. They're called the Savage Pokémon, and they live up to their name." I told her, as the red and blue blurs that hopped in and out of the water drew unsettlingly close to where we were standing. "You probably shouldn't be standing so close there, m'love."

"Okay…." Disappointed, yet understanding my worries, Annie looked back at the sneering fish, bidding him a fond farewell. "I can't wait to meet all the Pokémon from this region."

"To say 'all of the Pokémon' is a little ambitious, no?" There's a reason they dropped the old 'gotta catch'em all' tagline. "I suppose nothing's impossible."

"My first Gym Battle will be in Mauville City, right Chet?"

"That's right, but we'll be landing at Slateport first. Stock up on the necessities, take in the sights, you know how it is."

"We be approch'n d' shor' o Slatepert, me laddy. Take yer' lass an' get ta' gettun'!" That was Ccaptain Angus speaking, or rather Captn' ANNGgusss as he pronounces it. "G' luck un' yer quest, lassy. An' don't be lettn' this ole bastad wit ye out yer soight, ye hear?"

"Aye aye, Captain!" Said Annie, pulling a quick salute.

"Thank you for the ride, Captain Angus. It would have been much more difficult traveling on our own this far." Random encounters on the water are even worse than cave Zubats in terms of annoyance, after all.

"Twert nuth'n, Laddy. Jus' be sure ta' wotch yerself out d'ere." His muscular tanned arms turning at the wheel, I could almost feel the sands of slate port between my toes now. "Alroight! Ful speed ta' de North!"

So begins our much belayed journey into the mysterious Hoenn region. Wish us luck everyone.


	2. Round 1: Slateport's Battle Tent

Upon embarking on a new journey, one should always stock up on the necessities. Food, water, sleeping bags, and compartmentalized tents are always must haves when you aren't certain where you'll be sleeping at any given night. Even those things we take for granted, toiletries and ceramics, can become mean the difference between a life of humble travel and a life of eternal dysentery.

"Mr. Chet, I'm bored!" Unfortunately, children rarely appreciate this notion as they'd rather dream of adventure than prepare for one. My precious Annie was no exception, her love for the bazar rivaling my love of nude Carvanha wrestling. "We've been shopping since yesterday! Isn't there anything more fun we can do?"

I was almost too busy with my eyes among the many delightful low priced ceramic wares to hear her. The marketplace scene being one I much enjoy. The colorful, eye catching banners, the vast assortment of personalities among the vendor, the plethora of different wares to purchase.

Yes, I can get a bit shop happy, but not enough to ignore my Cute Hoodie Girl, Anilyn. "There is the maritime museum on the other side of town. Would you like to check that out?" I say this with the understanding that museums are not all too exciting, but this is Slateport. There just ain't much else to do.

Perhaps unimpressed with my suggestion, Annie began to pout. "Mr. Chet, you sound like an old man who forgot what 'fun' means." She can be quite hurtful at times. "Museums are okay, but isn't there anything else that's a bit more…?"

Annie looks to be combing her brain for the proper adjective.

"Kinetic?" I suggested.

"Yes!" The girl blurted out, though the look on her face tells me that she probably doesn't know what exactly the word means. "I don't know what that means, but it sounds right!"

Note to self: Buy this girl a dictionary.

"Well, if I remember correctly, there's a contest hall here in Slateport." The contest hall in Slateport offers the Super Rank of contest, I believe. Due north of the bazar, in fact. "I don't think you qualify to participate, my love, but we could spectate from the stands if you'd like."

"Mr. Chet, why are you using so many big words all of a sudden?"

"For your benefit, my sweet, for your benefit." And I wasn't using that many big words.

…

I remember the contest hall being just north of the bazar, so we at least didn't have to walk far. It was a short walk than the oceanic museum, at least. It's been well over a year since I've been to the Hoenn region at all, and I spent most of my time in Slateport with my head and wallet among the bazar stalls. Still, I'd like to think that I'd remember a land mark as large and as tacky as those big red buildings. Yet here we are, standing in front of some bulbous blancmange-shaped structure. The color scheme is similar to the red and blue of the old contest halls, but the colors here seem brighter.

"Is this the contest hall, Mr. Chet?" Asked Annie, who seemed concerned by the face I had been making. "You don't look so sure."

"Well, it's good that you caught that, my Hoodie Goodie Love, because I'm not sure where we even are." I spot an electronic signboard to our left. There it read, in bright orange letters, 'BATTLE TENT SLATEPORT SITE Find it! The ultimate Pokémon!' "Apparently, this has something to do with Mewtwo…."

"Ha! Not hardly." Heckled someone behind and to the left of me, and probably far enough away that I can't immediately punch them in the mouth. His voice was raspy and condescending like someone who wants to be punched in the mouth….

I turned around to see a smarmy looking bastard in a baggy jumpsuit lined with pockets near his every joint. He wore on his face a pair of glasses with black, square frames and green arms to hang over his ears. His eyes were half open with an unflattering smugness in them, and it makes me want to punch him even more. His hair was cut in more or less a bowl, if the bow had been chipped a bit near his face to give a v-shape to his bangs.

All in all, this is a man who deserves one right in the kisser, but I've got more self control than to punch someone in the mouth for no good reason…. Not someone I've only just met anyway.

"They call me Em." Em introduced himself without telling us his real name. "These Battle Tents have been up for a while now. They set 'em up where the old contest halls used to be after the Pokémon Contest Association streamlined everything and started holding all the contests in Lillycove." Said the surprisingly knowledgeable Em.

"You seem to know quite a bit. Are you from around here?" I asked him.

"Ha! Nah…. I'm just here buying supplies. Family lives in Littleroot, a little nowhere village just south of Oldale Town." He pointed towards the battle tent's front opening. "There're three Battle Tents in the Hoenn Region. One here, one in Verdanturf, and one up north in a place called Fallarbor Town. You can challenge them, and win little prizes for beating three other trainers."

"Ooh! Ooh! Mr. Chet, I wanna do it! I wanna do it!" Said Annie, and it's not like I can say no to her when she's like this.

"Well, sure. We're in no hurry after all." I said, immediately grabbing hold of her hand so that she didn't run off inside without me.

My Annie smiled beamingly as always. She was just excited to be able to do something she thought was fun, I suppose. Pulling my arm as she is, I sometimes forget just how excitable my little Hoodie can be sometimes.

Turning to thank the smug Em for his help, I am cut short by Annie dragging me away by my arm to the blancmange Battle Tent.

"Hoodie!" I shouted.

"C'mon, Mr. Chet!" She giggled as the salt of my soles wore against the stone brick walk path.

Honestly….

…

Cold is the word I think best describes the interior of this so-called Battle Tent. The floor is tiled white and gray, lights of red and yellow flash in time with a rhythmic techno beat, and the odd wailing of prerecorded steam boiling out of pipes piles on to an already aggressive machinery themed feel to this rather cramped facility.

"It's so cool here!" Said Annie, whose bright outlook found charm in this tacky, claustrophobic space. "Where do I sign up, Mr. Chet?"

"Over there. Go ask the man in the white lab coat." Said Em, who followed us in for some reason.

"Why are you here?" I asked.

Em shrugged his shoulders. "I was going in to watch. What of it?"

"Mr. Chet, could you help me fill out this form?" Hoodie called me before I could respond.

"Coming, my love!" I shouted, earning the odd stares of everyone in the room as I giddly rushed to my little girl's side. "Let's see here. What seems to be the problem?"

"What does occupation mean?"

"They're asking what you do for a living. 'What's your job?' in other words." I enlightened her.

Annie's eyes wandered across the ceiling as she thought over what to write. "I protect the world by keeping Mr. Chet as far away from other girls as possible!" Said Annie, earning her the stares which had been focused on me just previously.

I'm starting to worry over what kind of person you think I am, Hoodie Girl. "Umm…. Annie? What do you think would happen if I get close to other girls?" I shutter to think.

She then looked at me with eyes wide, yet unexpressive. She met my gaze with her own focused stare, and she said to me, "Death." with a face as gravely serious as Y. Pestis.

"You just need to put your trainer class…." Said Em, still behind me, looking every bit as terrified as I was. "I'm guessing Hex Manic…."

"I'm not that dowdy!" Annie argued, switching from grave to goofy in no time at all. "You're mean!"

So Em and I helped Annie fill out her form, though Em was afraid to come any closer than four feet away from her. The form was for a rental battle, as it were, which is just as well. Annie and I only brought one Pokémon each from our time in Johto, but the Battle Tent still required three. Handing in her form to the host at the front desk, she was taken to the back room, and I already feel lonely without a cute little thing in a lizard outfit at my side.

"Hey." Em tapped at my left shoulder. "The spectator's entrance is over there if you want to watch." He said, pointing at an almost unnoticeable door in the corner of the room.

"I suppose I'll go an see how she fares." I say, wishing that multi-battles were offered. "Ho hum…."

I followed Em to the spectator seats. Already, my little Annie was in her corner of the field, marked her by a wide hexagonal shape. The whole playing field seemed to be based around irregular shapes. Save for the Pokéball shape in its direct center, the battle ground seemed to be based around hexagons, rather than squares to form a rough H shape with both trainers respective squares indenting into it.

"Your little girlfriend looks like she's ready to kick some butt." Said Em, whose normalcy I draw to question. After all, it's one thing to follow a devilishly handsome man like myself around despite only just meeting him, but it's another thing entirely to keep following him after you discover that his cute little lady friend is a psycho. "I'm jealous now. I want a kick ass little girlie following me around, too…."

Oh my goodness, I get it now. He wants my sexy bod!

"How daring…!" I blurted out.

"What is?" He asked me, as if he didn't already know.

"Attention!" The unmistakable voice of a man trained to hold flags catches my ear. The referee took the stage with with one green flag and one red, and a pair of knee high black socks and shorts on to accentuate his lovely calves. "The first round of the Battle Tent Challenge shall commence shortly! In the green corner, we have the Trainer Anilyn Sumanson from Mintale Town in the Kanto Region!" He said, raising his green flag Annie's way before dropping it back down and raising the opposite flag. "In the red corner, we have the Trainer Ryouna Shirogami! All the way from the United States!"

The United States? Like Lt. Surge? That's rare, actually. My interest piqued, I looked over to the boy standing opposite my Annie on the field. With a head of golden blonde hair and eyes like sapphire daggers, a stern faced boy in a buttoned up black gakuran suit stood ramrod stiff as the announcer called his name. He was polished in both his stride and his black shoes which reflected the light like black mirrors on his feet. He carried three Pokéballs in their miniature state in his hands: one in his right, and the other two in his left….

I'm a little worried now. If this boy battles as well as he presents himself, I shutter to think how well my little Annie will fare….

"Wow…. A full-fledged foreigner." Em stated, possibly to distract himself from my sexiness. "That certainly ain't a name from around these parts."

"That ain't a typical American name either, I don't believe." I told him. Actually, the last time I heard a name even remotely like that one was…

"The battle will end when one or both trainers exhaust all of their usable Pokémon. No substitutions allowed, and any Pokémon recalled in battle will be considered unable to battle. With that said, LET THE CONTEST BEGIN!"

Annie, zealous almost to a fault, is the first to throw out her Pokémon. "Alright! I don't know you very well, but I hope we get along!" She said, smooching the button on the miniaturized Pokéball to bring it to it's full size. "Grovyle, let's fight together!" Annie threw out her first of three Pokéballs into the battlefield.

Materializing from the ball was a Grovyle, a Wood Gecko Pokémon. At three around feet tall, Annie's first pick among the rental Pokémon looked to be on the tall side of its species. The creature was predominantly green with red on its abdomen stretching up its neck to its lower jaw, didactyl hands and claws, and sullen yellow eyes. It was a Grass-type Pokémon after all, so leafy growths were not out of place. Three small leaves grew out of each of its forearms towards the elbows for a total of six. Another two leaves grew out of its rear to function as a pair of tails, and the single largest leaf grew out of its cranium, though that is not considered when measuring the creature's height.

"Grovyle…." The lizard hissed as it was brought out. Rather than looking ferocious, Annie's Grovyle seemed distant. It was as if it did not realize that it was just brought into battle.

"Wow, Grovyle! You look so cool!" But it's not like Annie cared about that. She just reveled in the fact that it was a reptile. "Let's work together well, okay?"

"Wow…." Em seemed impressed, standing with his arms rested on the barrier between where we spectators stood and the battlefield. "Your little girlfriend really likes lizards, don't she?"

Is he waiting for me to deny that Annie's my girlfriend? Well, he's out of luck. We may not be an official couple, but I'm still aiming for her. I ship us all the way!

*THUD!*

While we were talking, Annie's opponent had already summoned his Pokémon. The sound of his thunderous landing onto the field boomed all the way to us here in the stands. Grey plates extruded from an already stoney hide. On all fours, this lumbering creature had his eyes and his horned snout focused solely on Annie's Grovyle.

"Wow! You've got a Rhyhorn!" Annie squealed delightfully. "That's so cool!"

"…." Annie's opponent, young Mr. Shirogami, remained silent, as if he did not even hear her.

"A Rhyhorn, eh?" Em said. His tone of voice belayed a sense of disappointment. "Look's like the little lady's already got a win. Rhyhorn's double typing means it's game over."

I would usually agree with him. Rhyhorn's Rock/Ground typing means that any Grass or Water type attacks that land will be at least four times as strong. Annie should win this first match easy, but when I look down at Shirogami…, I don't like the look in his eyes.

"Grovyle, let's start it off with Leaf Blade!" Annie commanded.

"Rhyhorn, Bulldoze to neutralize it!"


	3. Round 2: Newcomer

The ground beneath our feet rumbled under Rhyhorn's thunderous stamps. The shaky ground made it hard for Annie's Grovyle, whose species would normally run circles around any Rhyhorn, to maintain it's footing.

"Grovyle, watch out!" Annie warned her Pokémon of the incoming attack at what was possibly the worst time to do so.

Hesitantly, Grovyle looked back at his current trainer. The girl worriedly hollered in the thick of battle. He seemed puzzled, Annie's Grovyle, by the scene, and why wouldn't he? A trainer wouldn't scream like their Pokémon's life were on the line in the midst of a battle as heavily regulated as this. Because of his up bringing as a rental Pokémon, I'm sure that this all must have seemed ridiculous to the poor Pokémon. Still, with the thunderous stomps of a Rhyhorn stampeding his way, you'd think that Grovyle would know where to focus his attention.

"Vyle…!" Annie's Grovyle was met horn first by the opposing Rhyhorn, who then tossed him into the air like a leafy, green pancake from an oiled pan.

Landing flat on his back, Grovyle was still capable of battle, but not in any position favorable to him. Rhyhorn, however, was already drawing back its feet in anticipation of its trainer's next command.

"That's some bad luck…." Said Em, who watched that pitiful scene from the same vantage point as I had. "I guess we can consider that a miss, eh? Still, Bulldoze is a Ground-type attack. It shouldn't be too much of a problem for her."

Luck had nothing to do with it, friend. Annie's Grovyle failed to attack because she got carried away and screamed like someone was going to die. This battle won't be decided by luck. It will be decided by experience, and as I look at the opposite end of the battle field, I can see that Mr. Shirogami is much more composed as he observes the actions of his Pokémon.

"Rhyhorn, use Mega Horn." Rhyhorn's horn then extended three times and glowed with a pale green.

"Grovyle, please use Leaf Blade!" Annie's command was more of a plea than an actual command.

This time, Grovyle was certain enough that his current trainer didn't expect him to curl up and take a beating, though Annie still wasn't all that convincing. Still flat on his back, Grovyle found it in himself to fight. However, that could prove difficult while flat on his back. With the leaves on his arms glowing a bright green, Grovyle slashed wildly and impotently at the on coming Rhyhorn, whose Mega Horn attack was almost certainly going to be a one hit knockout.

And so they clashed, Grovyle's Leaf Blade against Rhyhorn's Mega Horn. Neither Pokémon looked to want to give an inch, but Rhyhorn eventually won out because Annie's Grovyle was FLAT ON HIS OWN BACK! There are times when a type advantage means very little, and you see that quite a bit in mid to high tier battles such, but it's just sad when you lose a battle because your Pokémon was too dense to even consider getting off his stupid leafy behind to try and evade.

I'm not even going to blame Annie for this one. Grovyle, you are not a smart man. You are dumb. You are a very, very dumb.

"Grovyle!" Annie shouted as Grovyle lied unconscious on the battlefield with a victorious, if considerably injured Rhyhorn standing over him. "You can return now, so please rest!" Annie recalled Grovyle to his Pokéball, dematerializing him from under her opponent's Pokémon.

"How did that Rhyhorn survive a Leaf Blade?" Asked Em, who has proven himself to be rather chatty.

"It's simple." I began. "Grovyle and its evolved and pre-evolved excel more in their special attack and speed stats. Rhyhorn and its evolutions favor their attack and defense stats."

"Oh? I get it now." Said Em, glancing briefly at me. "So Grovyle's attack wasn't as strong as it should be because his stats didn't match up?"

"Precisely." I looked back down at Mr. Shirogami's Rhyhorn, breathing heavily and wincing in pain. "Still, Leaf Blade can do good enough damage to cripple a tank like that. That Mega Horn earlier just overpowered it."

"Awww…." Annie sighed, disappointedly. "Okay! I'll just have to try harder! Go Tropius!"

Another Grass-type? I thought.

Annie's second Pokémon was the oddly named "Fruit Pokémon," Tropius. Annie's love for lizards is really shining through in this battle. Her eyes were practically glimmering as she observed the long neck and leafy wings of the sauropod whose fruit bearing chin and four leafy wings drew to question whether this thing was really plant or animal.

"Well, at least it's a flying type, right?" Em said to me, smiling as if he saw a glimmer of hope for Annie in this battle yet. "That Tropius she picked is immune to any Ground-type moves."

I found myself with my arms crossed as I stared down at Annie's losing battle. I was only half listening to Em at this point, but that didn't really matter. His statements were easy enough to rebuke. "That's not what has me worried…."

The question "Why?" may as well have been written on his face with black marker.

…

"Mr. Chet, I lost!" Annie cried, running up to me with all the strength of a pigmy rhinoceros. Her feet left the ground a few feet in front of me, and her head made first impact with my chest. I stumbled back, but I did not fall. Her arms wrapped around my torso while her feet were far above my head in the air. I grabbed hold of her waist and pulled her feet back down to the dirt. "Say something funny and make me feel better…."

"I'm not a penny a go comedian, my love." I said while holding her. "I'm not even coin fed."

She looked up at me while making a pitiful face. "Then…, can you hug me real tight?" Annie squeezed my waist.

"Sure thing…." I wanted to tease her, but all I could do was hold her tight until she started to feel better.

"C'mon now, I'm diabetic…." Said Em, who's still hanging around us For reasons known only to him.

"No one's telling you to stick around." I told him. "Why are you still here even?"

"You guys seem fun and I'm on my own, so why don't we travel together?"

I feel as though there have been some misunderstanding between Mr. Em and I, and I'd like to clear the air of any deceiving fog. Before we reach any further misunderstanding. "I'm sorry, bruh. I'm not attracted to you." I told him, putting it as succinctly as I could.

My statement seems to have stuck Em deeply. His eyes opened wide, and he was quite obviously caught off his guard. "Well, fine! I wasn't aware that was even on the table…." He said, eyes ready to pop out their sockets.

"I'm sorry, but your forwardness is awfully off putting.…"

"Mr. Chet, hug me!" As much as I would like to continue speaking with Mr. Em I had other duties that required my undivided attention.

"Duty calls, I'm afraid." I said, squeezing Annie to the best of my abilities. "It was certainly nice meeting you, Em, but I'm afraid that Annie and I will be headed up to Mauville City, shortly."

…

Eventually, Annie had cheered up enough to where I didn't have to stay glued to her, and the two of us then left a dejected looking Em behind in Slateport. While his offer was sweet, he's a bit of a weirdo, and I'd rather he no be close to Annie. She has enough bad influences with just me around….

"Mr. Chet, why do you look so serious?" Annie asked me while I was in the middle of a thought.

"I was just thinking of that guy we met in Slateport." I told her. "He want to travel with us after only just meeting us. Isn't that a bit strange?"

"Mr. Chet, I don't think you should be calling other people strange." Annie giggled. "Back in Johto, I remember wanting to travel with you and Jakey after just meeting you."

"Yes, but you were a cute little girl in a Politoad outfit. The situation was completely different." This go around it was some weirdo in a jumpsuit wanting to tag along with me and my little girl in a Kecleon outfit. "I'm not against finding someone else to come with us."

Actually, it would be better if someone were to travel with us. I'd rather have someone be with Annie if ever we were to be separated than not, but I'd still rather her not be stuck with some weirdo that isn't me.

Once upon a time, Annie and I had one such third wheel mounted on the back door. His little Jacob Winters (age 10), but he was far to cute of a child to be named Jacob, so we just called him Jakey. Jackey was our straight man, our second banana, our stooge. We teased him a lot. It was hard not to because he was the most unbecomingly serious ten-year-olds around. He was stuffy, pouty, and far too serious, but he was just the most precious little boy you'd ever lay your eyes on. What's more, he proved to be no rival in my pursuit of Annie's affections. He was the perfect sidekick.

Unfortunately, fate decided to take him from us one day. We miss him loads, but we goofballs keep eachother company just fine.

"Mr. Chet!" Annie yelled with her heels dug into the ground and her hands gripping the sleeve of my shirt.

"What is it, love?" I asked her.

"You're walking off the road!" She said, drawing attention to the untrodden grass under our feet. "Where are you going?"

It seems that I've been wondering and wandering again. Goodness knows how long it's been since I've done that. In fact, I don't think I've ever thought so much about a boy that I've lost my way…. This calls for further investigation.

"Annie, where are we right now?" I ask her, hoping to regain my bearings.

"We're on route 110, Mr. Chet."

If I'm just going to space out every few feet, maybe it really is for the best that Annie and I find someone to play the straight man.

"Love, make it a point to draw my attention to any particularly straight laced individuals. We may have to find someone to take Jakey's place yet." Though the though of finding a new straight man tears at my heart strings like the claws of a cat slowly descending down a cloth curtain, the fact remains that neither I nor Annie can pull off being the stood for too long.

"Take Jakey's place?" She looked at me with a stern yet worrisome visage. "But, Mr. Chet, is there anyone else on this planet whose that big of a stick in the mud?"

"If not, then we'll just have to go in to space and comb the cosmos for the biggest stooge in the universe." Of course, actually sailing through space would require we hijack a shuttle from Mossdeep, so the biggest stooge on planet Earth would suffice.

"Should we hold auditions?" Asked Annie, who probably just wants to pretend to be an American Idol judge. "Please say yes."

She looks so cute when excited. How could I possibly say no? I couldn't of course, and thus began our own idol competition, or rather our own dupe competition. With the generous donation of materials from the man in the Trick House, Annie and I were able to fashion a modest little application stand from unused tatami mats and an old folding screen. Annie wanted to draw a picture of a punching bag on the front, but she wasn't used to drawing on a such a course surface.

Standing behind the stand, we received a genuinely surprising amount of traffic. Most of them were just guitarists with more dreams than talent and some wily youngsters wanting to battle, but no one came forward as someone I could rely on to travel across the region with Annie and I.

"I'm very sorry to have to say this, Mr.… Joseph, was it?" I'm asking because I was too busy rolling my eyes to listen when he introduced himself along to an untuned power chord. "I'm afraid you're just not what we're looking for." What we're looking for is a straight man to make a fool of. You, however, are too much of a fool as it stands.

Looking disappointed in his olive green overalls and hilarious blonde dye job, the guitarist Joseph slinked off. His guitar hung from its strap around his neck, swaying from side to side. Such pitiful care for his instrument makes me wonder how serious a guitarist he is, but at the same time it answer the question of why he's so shit at it.

"Mr. Chet, weren't you being a little mean?" Asked Annie, whose Abdul impression is just a little too kind for the good of my sanity.

"No, my love, I was being honest." Though, I admit that there isn't always a difference. And for the sake for of whoever it is that comes up to us next, I hope they're the one we're looking for. Otherwise, I might honestly beat them to death a bit of tatami. "Is there anyone else?"

"Here, sir!" Our next would be third wheel shouts and aggravates my steadily developing headache.

Shifting my gaze in the direction of the idiot who yelled, I'm caught off my guard by the sight of a familiar jumpsuit.

"It's Mr. Jumpsuit again." Said Annie, who I'm betting forgot his name.

"Indeed it is." That was fine. I forgot his name too. "How are you doing, Mr. Jumpsuit?" I asked whilst trying to spot the nearest bit of spare tatami in my peripheral vision.

"Umm…. That's not my name…." Speaking contrarily rather than restating his name. Very punching bag like. "I don't know if you remember, but I'd still very much like to travel along with you both."

"Well, you don't seem to leave much of an impression." if you did have any sort of notable presence, then we might not have forgotten your name.

"If Mr. Chet already told you no back in Slateport, why are you here now?" Asked Annie.

"Well, I was making my way up to Fallarbor Town, and I figured, since you both seemed to be traveling…," He seems hesitant, but I'm not entirely sure if I should give or deduct points for that. It's… borderline cute. "and also…, I'm lonely…."

Annie's pupils dilated with that, and mine were likely the same way. I felt the blood rush up to my cheeks, and if the same were true for Annie, her dark complexion did well to hide it. Mr. Jumpsuit's careful use of ellipsis and phrasing has indeed scored him a few points in my book, but he's still not over the top just yet. There are still a few things I find disconcerting about him. His height, for example. He's almost as tall as I am, and if you count that one idiot hair sticking out the top of his bonce, he's actually a little taller than me. That won't do.

"I know I was a little too forward back in Slateport, and I'm sorry." Don't worry, I can hardly remember any of that. "My dad always told me that I'm too meek for my own good, so I tried being confident, and that just creeped you out…. I'm a very hard worker, and I'm trying my best to study the Pokémon of this region."

"Well, Mr. Jumpsuit, your credentials seem to be in order. Do you have any special skills that could prove useful to us?"

"Special skills?" Mr. Jumpsuit repeated me, sounding doubtful.

"Any talents you have? They don't really have to be related to Pokémon." And Annie can't cook, so it'd be awesome if you could help me out with that.

"Umm…." He started to comb his thoughts with a finger under his chin. That old visual cue is a bit overdone, but Mr. Jumpsuit is turning out to be a right adorable fellow. "Well, there is one thing."

…

When I asked Mr. Jumpsuit if he had any talents, I thought he'd reply with something normal like cooking, or standup comedy, or underwater basket weaving, but now he's taken Annie and I to the top of the nearest and steepest hill over looking Route 110 and the Trick House where our stand was set up. The relative isolation of this area and the long fall just in front of us makes me worry that Mr. Jumpsuit's adorable demeanor earlier was the front for an undetected homicidal rage he may or may not have for us for forgetting his name.

Even as he stands there by the edge of the cliff, silently staring out into the far horizon, I get the feeling that three of us came up here and less than three of us will head back down.

"Umm…." I felt the familiar sensation of Annie tugging at my sleeve ends. "Mr. Chet, what's going on? Is he going to jump?"

Better him than me. I secretly thought. "Don't be silly, my love. He wouldn't bring us all the way up here for something so unsavory." But in the event he does turn on us, I've stripped off some tatami, sheathed them in the legs of my pants, and I'm not afraid to go for the eyes.

"Glider: On!" He shouted while I was off in my own thoughts, startling both Annie and I as a pair of long, thin wings stretched out from inside of his backpack. He extended his hands along with the wing which sprouted behind him. Though I could not see well from this angle, his hands looked to be grabbing on to a set of straps of some sort. "Sky Jacket Mk II: Pelipper!"

I don't like the sound of that. Is he really going to jump?

"Mr. Chet!" Annie seems just as perceptive as I am, already pleading that I do something to stop the maniac about to run off the cliff.

However, at the very second Annie opened her mouth, Mr. Jumpsuit lived up to the name we bestowed him, taking to the air and putting faith into his wings to keep him alive.

Annie and I ran to the cliff edge where that maniac stood just a moment ago before taking off. From there, we could see clearly as Mr. Jumpsuit briskly, but gently, glided back down to Route 110 at sea level. Approaching the ground, he rapidly bicycled his legs to run along with his landing. I was almost shaking with anticipation as he neared the ground, but my nervousness soon gave way to fascination as that crazy boy ran to his landing.

"That maniac…." I turned to Annie to see what she thought, but rather than words, the shimmering excitement in her eyes was answer enough. Bringing my attention back to the Jumpsuit, I threw my voice into my diaphragm and yelled. "Your hired!"


	4. Round 3: Too Annoying…

"It feels so good to be cooking for three again!" I say whilst cooking the last important meal of the day. "That's three humans, of course. We always had at least four a meal if you count the Pokés."

With the addition of Mr. Jumpsuit into our little cabal against the forces of evil, I've another mouth to feed, and that just baits at my maternal instincts. I've decided to make a simple potato soup for dinner because we just got on Route 110, and if'n we want to get to Mauville before the end of the week, we better rest up now and leave bright and early tomorrow morning.

"Annie, my love, can you get Punk out and find me some more kindling?" I got a fire started, but air is still really moist in this area. I could probably finish cooking with the wood I've got, but there's no such thing as being to careful.

"Okay, but make sure to give extra portions, okay?" She stated her terms, and scampered off into the thick of forest near by. I suppose that was her way of not giving me time to decline her deal.

"Don't be out too late!" I yelled as she faded out of my range of sight. "That girl…."

Stirring the stew with one hand and holding onto the pot's handle with another, I got lonely, and I decided to check up on Mr. Jumpsuit to see what he's doing. Looking back, I saw our resident gliding enthusiast flipping through the pages of one of Annie's old sketch books. I know for certain that it's one of her older ones because she keeps the ones she's using practically glued to her person at all times…. Makes me wish I were born a sketch book sometimes.

"Find something you like?" I asked Mr. Jumpsuit, who was probably just killing time until his food was ready.

"Your little girlfriend is pretty talented, isn't she?" He said, unblinkingly.

"That she is. She really has a thing for the lizzies and the scalies, but she draws all kinds of monsters. And 'Everything must be to scale!' otherwise she gets all irritated." I smile fondly. Hearing someone compliment my Hoodie Girl makes me well with happiness and pride. So much so that I just want to drop what I'm doing and squeeze her 'til she pops! "If you notice, she often likes to cheat with the backgrounds. Sometimes she does them, sometimes she does foreground if she has a creature sprouting from the earth or otherwise displacing it's surroundings, but usually it's just the ground beneath its feet or little single colored shapes for backgrounds of people." Ooh la la~ my soup is coming along nicely!

After finishing my little spiel on Annie's artistic shortcuts, I see Annie's sketchbook closed, resting on Jumpsuit's chest while he grins at me.

"You're really attentive when it comes to your girlfriend, aren't you?" He asks me, that stupid look on his mug niggling at my patience somewhat.

Jumpsuit's penetrating smile is almost enough to make me want to deny Annie as my cutie belle however much I wish it were actually true. "Aren't you a little young to be throwing out words like 'attentive'? Are you a gossiping housewife?"

"I just meant you pay close attention to the little things." He said, weaseling away from the consequences of what he just said a moment ago.

I'm not going to argue with that. Annie is a tiny little thing. "I've my sights set on her, after all. But that's enough about me, Jumpsuit. A blind man could see that I have a bad case of the pitter-pats for Annie, but what's with you? Do you jump off cliffs because you think you'r part Taillow?"

Jumpsuit's smile falls nervous. What's the matter, Mr. Jumpsuit? Has my mastery of the language left you in unblinking awe? "You have a weird way of asking things, Mr. Chet." He told me, his visage unmoving.

Well, your jumpsuit looks like your mother sew it up from one of her old dresses.

"Haven't you ever wanted to fly, Mr. Chet?" Jumpsuit poses an interesting question. Or maybe not all that interesting because I can kinda see where this is going. "My Dad's always been a maniac when it comes to Pokémon Battles." Saying this, Jumpsuit lays Annie's sketch book to the side, rises to his feet, and stands tall like someone stuck a broom up his rear end. "Watch closely, Son. You a always be mindful of the Pokémon you face. As you train there are some things that you must blah, blah, blah, blah, blah…." He threw his hands up and allowed himself to collapse to the grass behind him.

"It sounds like you don't share your father's enthusiasm for battle." To put it mildly. "But that doesn't tell me anything about why you hide a pair of papier-mâché wings in your pack."

He smiled awkwardly, and I'm beginning to think that he defaults to gawky when unsure. "Yeah, well, because dad is such a battle nut, he took me all over to just to get me to like battling, and I do like battling, but not as much as he does." With a press of the button on his right sleeve cuff, Jumpsuit's glider spread out of his pack. Because his pack seems very much separate from his jumpsuit, I wonder what sort of mechanism he employs to get the two to synch up. Maybe it's wireless? "Always liked Flying-types, the birds especially. Even when Dad dragged me to a new region, I'd just look up and see all the birds flying over head…."

Mr. Jumpsuit goes on with his story. Sparing no detail, he tells me his backstory: His time traveling with his father in the regions of Kanto, Sinnoh, Almia, and Kalos. He told me of his time in Goldenrod City in Johto, where he was born. However, amidst the fun of sharing his past, Jumpsuit failed to notice that I stopped caring and went back to making dinner.

"I decided that I wanted to be a Sky Trainer, just like the ones I met in the Kalos region, but Dad didn't approve. 'A Sky Trainer? Don't you get yourself swooped up by some nonsense fad.' he'd say…" He's still going, and going, and going, and Annie what's taking you so long?

…

"Skreee!" Piercing through the quiet air of the wooded thick to the left of Route 110 was the high pitched shriek of a Pokémon not native to the region. She glided between the branches of far apart trees, combing the ground for hefty, hearth worthy bits of timber all the while keeping an an eye out for any dangerous Pokémon which might lay within the forest depths. Though its keen eyes kept watch not for only herself, but for her little hooded trainer as well. "Skreee!"

"Punk, if you keep making so much noise, your just going to attract more wild ones." Said Annie, with her arms full with adequate kindling. "Mr. Chet said that we should be as quiet as we can so we don't get attacked."

"Skree…." Clinging close to the tree end of a high branch, the magenta colored creature's eyes fell sad. Her two pincer claws released their hold on the branch, and she fell. Holding out her arms as she fell, wind caught under Punk's webbed glider wings, and she gently descended towards the ground and into Annie's arms which also held their firewood.

"If you do that again, I'll throw you in a pot and cook you!" She scolded her Pokémon, probably joking.

Punk responded to her with a fond lick, her long pink tongue lapped the girl's cheek with a string of saliva trailing it to drip down to Annie's clothes.

"Eww…. Now I'm all slobbery…." Annie didn't really mind much, but slobber isn't all too pleasant either way. "I don't think we have enough, but we better get back before Mr. Chet starts to worry."

Annie had more than enough wood to keep their lunch pyre up for at least an hour. Chet was near done when she left him last, but it would only get colder during the night, and staying out a little longer to collect a more wood for a night time fire wouldn't hurt anyone.

*snap!*

The low, squick pop of a twig under foot amidst the wood's quiet so startled little Annie that her feet could meet her bosom at her standing height. Dropping her load of twigs and branches to the dirt, and with Punk leaping between her and whatever it was that could be stalking them in the forest.

"Skree!" Punk screeched, though the opponent's defense was unchanged.

"Who's there?" Asked Annie.

The stranger did not answer Annie's call. Rather, the soft sound of feet stepping over the forest floor came in short, yet unhurried intervals. Still, this calm pace was anything but to our Annie, who's experience with situations such as this were limited to when Chet would sneak up behind him, and even then Chet had a distinct aura around him which alerted everyone around of his presence. This was certainly not Chet; Annie had no idea who this stranger was, and with every nearing step, her heart pounded.

Punk, Annie's faithful Gligar, stood between her master and the unknown opposite presence. Her mindset was to protect Annie as any Pokémon would for their trainer.

"Skree." Punk hissed.

"Call your Pokémon off." A voice came from the direction of the unknown presence. Itself then followed by the not entirely unfamiliar sight. Out from the forest thick came a young boy, golden blonde as no one else Annie had ever met. His eyes, like sapphire daggers, skewered her with his gaze alone. His hands, raised in well above his head with palms to her, were gloved in white cotton, tho they remained spotless even in this forest scene. "My name is Ryouna Shirogami, and I mean no harm."

Annie recognized Mr. Shirogami as her one opponent from her Battle Tent Challenge in Slateport. He was obviously a foreigner as told both by his name and appearance. Even his manner of speaking, overly proper and meticulous in his phrasing, showed his lack of finesse with the language.

"I remember you." Said Annie, loosening her guard. "You were from the Battle Tent."

Shirogami nodded. "That is right." He said, tersely.

Punk looked back at her trainer, confused by this development, and unsure of what to do next.

"It's alright, Punk. He's not dangerous." Annie couldn't be sure of that, but her naïvety would not likely be punished here. "So what are you doing here?" She asked.

"…" Unlike Annie, Shirogami was much more wary about speaking with strangers. His only reason for coming out into the open being that he did not want to get attacked by Punk. "I was collecting wood to burn."

"Me too!" Said Annie, excitedly. "Are you with a group."

Shirogami was taken aback by Annie's sudden exuberance when just a moment ago she looked to want to run away. Wordlessly, Shirogami shook his head in the negative sense.

Annie then smiled widely. "Mr. Chet is cooking potato soup, so he sent me out to look for firewood. If you're not traveling with anybody, then we should look together!" She said, closing in on the boy and invading his personal space.

"That really is not-" Shirogami started to decline, but he obviously didn't know Annie very well.

"It's fine!" Annie assured him, grabbing onto his right arm with both of her hands. "The fire will last much longer if we share our firewood."

"No, really…" Failing his attempts at protest, Shirogami was dragged away by the arm. "W-Wait!"

"Don't worry!" Annie was not about to take no for an answer. "Mr. Chet always makes enough for more. It's no trouble at all!" She said, dragging

And so, Annie abducted Mr. Ryouna Shirogami as her party's temporary fourth member.

…

"And that's how I made this suit." It feels like two hours since I sent Annie off, and I think this is maybe the first time Jumpsuit has given me the space to get a word in since. "The real trick was finding out how much wind resistance I could afford without making my suit ride up…"

Never mind. He's still going, and I'm still trying to figure out how hard I'd have to hit him with my ladle to send him to dreamland.

"Mr. Chet, I'm back!" The siren sound of my angelic rescuer signals the end of my torment. "And I brought a friend!"

Jumpsuit and I turn to meet Annie, who is tailed closely by a fierce-looking blonde haired child. I couldn't care less about that as I drop my ladle into my soup and run to my Cute Hoodie Girl with both arms extend outwards and open to her.

"Annie!" I yelled, holding back tears of relief. I held her in my arms, took her from the ground, and twirled on the toe of my left foot. "You wouldn't believe how much I missed you!" I assaulted her cheeks with kisses and thanked goodness that I have my Annie.

"I missed you too, Mr. Chet." She responded, stunned but not denying my affection, even going as far as to hug me back. "But I was only gone thirty minutes. You're such a drama queen."

Annie giggled at my expense, but I didn't care. That thirty minutes felt like two hours.

Jumpsuit followed me to our two tiny friends, or rather our one tiny Annie and the little blonde boy with eyes like he's trying to stare down a Gyarados. Speaking of which…

"Annie, did you make a friend?" I asked her. "And did you make him mad, or does he always look like his breakfast broke wind in his mouth?"

"I was born this way." Resigned the boy.

"Well, I'm not sure what happened out there in the forest, but since this is Annie we're talking about, I'll go ahead and assume that she kidnapped you."

"Yep!" Annie admitted her crime, smiling unapologetically as the kidnapped boy just stared at her audacious self. "This is Shirogami. He was the one that beat me in the Battle Tent, remember?"

"Of course I do! He's got a rather striking image to him after all." It's not like I could forget a pair of peepers as hostile as those in Mr. Shirogami's sockets. "It's only just been a few hours. How could I forget his name already."

"You forgot my name." Said Jumpsuit.

"Shirogami helped me get firewood, so I promised him he could eat with us." Said Annie, whose attempt at chiming past the Jumpsuit's statement was only painfully obvious.

"Is that so?" As long as he doesn't turn up as a rival for Annie's affections, Shirogami's fine by me. "Well, Mr. Shirogami, I hope you like potatoes because I just finished my soup."

Shirogami's expression was mute beyond his fierce eyes. Bowing forward slightly, he said to me, "Thank you for your kindness."

It was a bit much to bow so deeply for of potato soup. It honestly made me feel a little embarrassed. But, as extreme as it was, I couldn't help but think of Shirogami as a well mannered young man. It's just too bad that he has such frightful eyes.

"Alright, everyone, gather 'round the fire. Soup's on." I called everyone to eat after fishing out my ladle from the pot. However, it's not just we human-folk that need to eat to survive. "Those of you with Pokémon on you, feel free to let them out. They need to eat too."

"Our Pokémon?" Young Mr. Shirogami didn't appear quite used to eating along side his Pokémon, but that's not how we do things in this party.

Annie smiled his way, her sunny disposition practically shining for his attention. "C'mon, Shirogami. You saw my Pokémon already, so let's see yours."

With his face as it is, I find it rather difficult to gauge Shirogami. Is he embarrassed? Is he annoyed? I wouldn't want to aggravate him when we've only just met.

"Forrest! Galley!" Apropos, Jumpsuit saw fit to throw out nouns for no readily apparent reason. "It's dinner time!" He then threw out his two Pokéballs out in front of us, which then opened up to reveal his Pokémon.

The first of the two, and the one whom I presume to be called Forrest, was a Grovyle. Near identical to the one Annie made use of in the Battle Tent. However,, Jumpsuit's Forrest was easily distinguishable from his species relative by a much more dutiful look and posture. Standing straight up with his arms crossed, I get the feeling that Forrest will turn out to be one boring Lizard.

The second of Jumpsuits two Pokémon, who I am left to assume is the one he refers to as Galley, is a Pelipper. Pelippers are a curious breed as I hesitate to call them birds, though they are known as the Water Bird Pokémon. I hesitate to call them birds because they're all mouth. Literally. They have long, thin wings of white feathers with blue at the ends and a blue crest atop their relatively tiny brain cases, but most of the creature's body is his gigantic scooping beak.

"Pelipper!" Galley seems to be of the jolly sort and thereby much more fun than his leafier land bound counterpart.

"Oh wow!" Speaking of jolliness, Annie spotted Jumpsuit's Forrest immediately, and attached herself to the creatures neck. "A real Grovyle!"

I had to apologize to Jumpsuit. "Sorry about that, friend. Annie really loves her lizzies." I say this, but while I apologize for Annie's behavior, Jumpsuit has preoccupied himself by curiously poking and prodding at the wings of Annie's Gligar, Punk.

"Does wind caught beneath these wings alone provide for enough lift to keep a creature such as this off the ground…." He was in his own little zone now. Jumpsuit is free to ask as many questions as he wanted, but if he keeps going as he's going he'll soon know the pain of a Gligar's Poison Sting.

Leaving Annie and Jumpsuit to their respective obsessions, I turned to Mr, Shirogami, whose face I still could not read. He stared daggers at Galley, the happy dancing Pelipper, though I felt no malice in his eyes, and neither did Galley, who just kept on with his boogie.

"I'm not about to fawn over you, if that's what you think." Said Shirogami, quickly.

Galley didn't seem to care much either way, and kept on dancing his awkward hopping dance.

I noticed that while Annie and Jumpsuit had let out their Pokémon, Mr. Shirogami had not shown us his.

"Why don't you let out your Pokémon?" I asked him, finally. "I'm sure I could whip something up even if he's not the type to like potato soup."

I must have startled him. He grimaced my way, looking unsure what to say. "You don't have any Pokémon out either." He pointed out.

I didn't quite like his tone there, but I'll let it slide. "Well, I've only got one Pokémon on me, and he's pretty much water bound. It wouldn't be right for me to toss him out onto land." I try smiling at him with hopes that Mr. Shirogami will ease up.

However, Mr. Shirogami only stiffened in response to my smile. His posture had him up like an Army Drill Sargent at attention with a back brace on. "Mine, too…." He said, though I doubt him for some reason.

There's something about this one that I don't like. Be it his scary eyes or his terseness of speech I don't know, but something about Ryouna Shirogami irks me. Just him being here bothers me, but I can't say why….

"C'mon, Shirogami." Annie called, wrapping both of her arms around Shirogami's left before dragging him off near the stew pot. "You can sit next to me."

Never mind. I think I've just about figured it all out, though I'm no happier for it.

By sundown, the soup had vanished, the Pokés were fed, and everyone was just about ready to set up for the night. Jumpsuit and I, being the two tallest of our group, busied ourselves by setting up the night tents. Jumpsuit had one for himself, and Annie and I share our tent. I'm not sure what Mr. Shirogami intends to do about his sleeping arrangements, but I'm sure he has something planned.

A little ways off from where we set up camp, Mr. Shirogami headed off into the dusky night scene of Route 110. He carried with him a case full of all that he kept with him and all what he needed.

"Wait!" Annie shouted, running from our camp to catch up with Mr. Shirogami.

"…?" Shirogami looked back at Annie, who chased after him.

"Shirogami, where are you going? It's dangerous at night." She explained, concerned.

"It's just after nightfall. It's the best time to the nocturnals." Said Shirogami, with absolutely no signs of worry to him.

"When will you get back?" Annie pestered in. "Do you want me to come with you?"

Shirogami did not meet Annie's eyes at first. Rather, he his gaze met forward with Annie only barely noticeable in the corner of his eye. "I prefer to be on my own…." He said, then turning to face Annie and finally meeting her eyes. Bowing briefly he said, "Thank you again for your hospitality. Your older brother is a splendid cook."

"You're not coming back?" Asked Annie.

Shirogami's countenance grew painful, as if he were sick and nauseous. In fact, he was neither. With those striking eyes and his mouth which defaulted to scowl, that sickly expression may have been the closest he could manage to a face of apology.

"I really don't want to sound mean, but…" He took a long pause, maybe tossing around the words in his head to see how they sounded. "you're annoying."

You may not have meant it, Mr. Shirogami, but that was a bit mean.

"I'll leave now." He said, turning his back on Annie for the last time that night. "Extend my farewells to your brother and the Jumpsuit person."

With nothing left to say, Shirogami left their camp. Stunned, Annie watched as Shirogami's back faded into the distant night. She stood still. Her expression was mute. Not a tear was shed, but neither did she smile.

"Annie." I called for her, having just finished setting up our tent. "I don't mind you staying up, but I don't want you in the dark by yourself."

"Coming."

…


	5. Round 4: Inevitable

The early morning humidity of the Hoenn region has dampened my usual chipper out look somewhat as I find myself having to slog through even the most simple todos on my morning routine.

"Annie my love, are you ready to leave?" I yelled for her, my little hoodie girl nowhere in sight.

"I'm here." Said Annie, popping out of nowhere right next to me.

"Oh! How long have you been there, my sweet?" I asked her, wondering how I could have missed her cheer and kinetic fanfare.

"Just now." She said, smiling weakly at me.

Annie's smile has been weak ever since Shirogami blew her off last night. She spent all last night with her head against my chest, and Annie doesn't usually sleep on her side like that.

"Are you sure that you're alright, my friend?" I asked, for maybe the fifth time since she crawled into the tent last night.

"Mr. Chet, don't be so worried." She said, cheerfully beaming. "I was just a little sad that Shirogami didn't want to stay with us."

Though her smile was indeed brighter than just a moment ago, I worry that my little Annie is more bothered by this than she's letting on.

"Will the Young Couple get their rush on? Daylight's burning, and I'd like to make some distance today." Jumpsuit shouted, waiting for us a short bit up the road. "That's distance toward Mauville, just to be clear."

"Hold on Jumpsuit, we're on our way." I say while entertaining thoughts of sabotaging Jumpsuit's glider wings the next time he wants to make a jump. Turning to Annie, I extend my hand to her and we go off on our way.

"Are you two always this shameless?" Asked Jumpsuit, who sounded a little more confident than when we recruited him just yesterday. "Holding hands, hugging, and kissing in public…. It's unnecessary."

"For a prude like you, Jumpsuit, it's unnecessary, but my life depends on that steady supply of cutie energy I get from latching onto Annie…." Only after hearing myself say that out loud do I realize how ridiculous I sound.

Jumpsuit, however, saw it right away. Looking to me with a face of mixed pity and nausea. "So what's the plan for today?" He asked, his attempt at segue as smooth and as natural as a bit of broken glass in the eye socket.

"We're taking the underpass to Mauville, aren't we?" Said Annie, who counted the but of Route 110 under the cycling road as an underpass for some reason.

"Yes, but there's a good bit of walking todo before we get there, and while we're here, we might as well work on your party."

"If it's a party we're working on, I'll blow up the balloons. Chet, you can cook." Jumpsuit was joking, but the joke was so forced and unfunny that I had to resist smacking him behind his head. Once I get to know him better, I'll smack the piss out of him.

"That very lame joke aside, there is much work to be done if Annie is to be ready for her first Gym Battle." I probably shouldn't pick too much on Jumpsuit for his jocular inability. Glass houses and all that. "As it stands, Punk is Annie's only Pokémon."

Responding to this, Annie took Punk's Pokéball in hand. "But Mauville is an Electric-type Gym, isn't it? Punk's immune to electricity, so it shouldn't be a problem for her."

"Normally, but Gym Battles are usually half-battles, three-on-three. Punk might so fine, but three against one is not an easy fight, especially since you've only just started training seriously." Day light burned as we stood in there and I explained our goal for the evening. "If you want to win your first Gym Badge, you're going to have to prepare, and that means building up your party - I see you opening your mouth, Jumpsuit. I will leave you behind tied to a tree if I hear that lame joke again."

"Mr. Chet." Annie steals back my attention from Jumpsuit, who stands out as well as a single blade of grass in a lush green field. "Mr. Chet, what did you have in mind?"

"Well, that's really for you to decide, my love." I carried on as we walked, talking about the more boring issues of catch rates and rarities.

Annie was half listening to me, at least. Her eyes were locked on the path in front if her, and her ears sorted out the words of mine that were useful and those that were all just fluffery. Feeling a jumpsuited elbow jab at her sides, Annie turned her head towards Mr. Jumpsuit, who just assumed that I was extrapolating on my original statement of "We catch dah Pokey-mans now, hur-dee-durrr…".

"Hey, are you alright?" Asked Jumpsuit, without provocation.

Annie looked at him, puzzled. "Yeah, I'm okay. Why did you ask?"

"Well, it's just that yesterday you were practically glued to Chet's arm whenever you were together, and now you're eight paces behind." Jumpsuit shows to Annie his eyes of observation, though he also shows a rather impressive presumptuousness for someone whose only a second day trainee. "I just thought it was weird."

"Mr. Jumpsuit, that's kinda weird for you to say when we've only just met you yesterday." Said Annie, sharing my sentiment. "And I don't stick to Mr. Chet 100 percent of the time…. He'd probably think that'd be annoying too…."

"I don't think he'd call it annoying." Said Jumpsuit. "He's all smiley when talks about you."

"Mr. Chet's always like that." Annie smiled mutedly, walking forward while thinking about silly ol' me.

No complaints on my end. I tell you that.

Jumpsuit, however, was a less satisfied by Annie's abstruseness than I. Still, I doubt that anyone alive today could be as satisfied by that as I am, so we'll not hold it against him.

"Okay…." Said Jumpsuit, not entirely sure about what to make of my Annie's crypticness. "I'm here to talk to…. Just wanted you to know that if you ever need."

And then Annie stopped walking with Jumpsuit doing the same as so as he stepped ahead of her. To him, Annie payed a wonderful smile full of the warmth and tenderness Annie holds in her heart. I say enviable because there is nothing in the world I wouldn't give to have Annie smile at me like that. Hers is a purity and love which cannot be retained in photograph or paint. Annie's smile was something lovely. A pure white light emanated from her features and extended those precious feelings of warmth and tenderness from her lovely smile to our friend in his jumpsuit. I envy him. I envy him because I would give the world just to live my days in that warmth.

"Mr. Jumpsuit, you're actually really nice." Said Annie, still beaming. "I like you!"

Blood rushed up to Jumpsuit's face as he let himself get flustered by Annie's light. "Oh! Umm…." He was starting to flounder now. "Don't…. Don't mention it. I-I…."

It was at this point that I noticed that the two of them had started to lag behind. "Is something wrong?" I asked them, turning around and catching a glimpse of Annie's smile, though her brilliance faded as I took attention away from her. "Annie…."

She still smiled at me, but I felt something much different than her warmth. I felt uneasy as I looked at her and Jumpsuit together, but I'm not sure why.

"Mr. Chet, Mr. Jumpsuit was being forward with me!" Said Annie, who in one sentence emptied my soul of uneasiness before filling it with bloodlust.

"HE WHAT!" I yelled, my rage having filled my vision and all that I saw with a deep red tint.

"I did what?" Jumpsuit was of course innocent, but try telling me that when I start to fear that my Annie might get stolen away from me. "Annie, why would you say that?"

Without answering him, Annie threw herself at me. Her arms reached behind my back, and she held on tight to me. "Mr. Chet, Mr. Jumpsuit is nothing but a flirt!" She cried.

"Jumpsuit!" I yell at him.

"She's lying!" He tried to tell me, but I wouldn't believe him.

Annie let go of me, and I was on Jumpsuit in an instant. His shrill screams for mercy fell on deaf ears as I murdered him to death, brutally and with great prejudice.

Annie observed Jumpsuit's murder from a few feet away. She paid us her silent and unblinking attention. Was she enjoying the horrendous murder of another human being a little more than she should? Yes, but she's cute so I don't mind.

"This is a little bit disturbing." Said Annie, without once averting her gaze.

…

Now that I have successfully murdered Jumpsuit, my position as Annie's sole love interest remains intact and indisputable. However, as Annie and I pay our respects at his grave, it occurs to me that I have singlehandedly reduced our numbers by one trainer. It doesn't really matter because the ghost of our now deceased friend Jumpsuit remains on this plane to haunt us.

Problem solved!

"Guys, I'm not dead." He says while standing in front of his own grave. "You beat me up and buried my shoes…. I'd like them back."

Annie and I kneeled before our friend's grave.

"Ghosts don't need shoes…." I said, trying not to interrupt Annie's prayer.

"I'm not a ghost!" The Ghost of Jumpsuit, as it seems, has yet to come to terms with his own death. Fear not, my late friend, for we shall not rest until you have accepted your death. Fear not, for you shall pass on. "Can I at least dig up my shoes?"

It was at that did Annie rise from her kneeling prayer. Turning around and looking up to meet the Jumpsuit's ghostly eyes, Annie said to him, "Mr. Jumpsuit, I know that you're sad because you died…,"

"Still alive." The Ghost of Jumpsuit insisted.

"but a person's grave and everything in it are sacred! To take from a grave…, well, that's grave robbery!" Annie was steadfast and immovable. "That's just wrong! Only the worst kind of person would steal from someone's grave!"

"Well seeing as this is my grave and I'm still not dead, wouldn't this be an exception?"

"No exceptions!" She yelled at the ghost of our friend. "Grave robbery is bad!"

"But I'm…"

"Grave robbery is bad!" Annie looked at him with a fiery passion burning in her corneas. Unrelenting, her passionate stare could melt stone.

The Ghost of Jumpsuit, even without his life to protect and preserve, could not stand against Annie. "But my shoes-"

"Ghost don't need shoes!" Said Annie, repeating what I said however many lines ago, but with much more passion. "You will not defile my friend's grave."

…

"Did you have to take my socks, too? The grass is cold…." The Ghost of Jumpsuit whined. I paid him no mind because as a ghost, he shouldn't be able to distinguish hot and cold.

With the otherworldly aide of the Ghost of Jumpsuit, Annie and I combed the grassy patches in search of Annie's next Pokémon. Well, not really. More like we paid extra attention to the noises and sounds of the our immediate surroundings as we kept going towards Mauville because the Route 110 ain't getting any shorter and we need to get our rush on if Annie's going to get anywhere close to Mauville Gym before next week rolls around.

"Seriously guys, can we take a stop here? It's about time we eat, and if I don't let my feet warm up my toes are going to shrivel up and turn black like little frostbitten liquorish sticks." Said the Ghost of Jumpsuit, who really needs to shut up about his feet already.

"I am getting a little hungry, Mr. Chet." Annie brought up the topic of food, and rightly so. She's a growing girl, and shouldn't be forced to skip meals.

"Whatever you say, my love!" I calmly stated, not excited to cook for her at all. "So what would you like? We polished off the potato soup from last time, so whatever you want, I'll cook."

"I'm fine with anything you cook, Mr. Chet." Annie was just hungry. If I leave her alone too long, she might just eat Jumpsuit. "Do you want I collect some more firewood?"

Though, Jumpsuit is a ghost now, so I'm not sure how that would work. Is ectoplasm edible?

"That's not necessary, sweet pea. We've got some kindling left over from last night." I've been carrying them in my pack along with our tent, sleeping bags, a map of the region, my clothes, and over 100 pounds worth of berries. "Actually, since we're stopped, now's probably the best time to go look through the grass for your next Pokémon."

Annie nodded. "That sounds good."

"Okay, well since it's inefficient for all three of us to go find one Pokémon, Jumpsuit, why don't you start a fire and Annie and I will be back in a jiffy, yes?" While I admit it's nice to be cooking for two healthy kids again, a third wheel is a third wheel.

"I can go with the Ghost of Jumpsuit." Said Annie, who in eight words smacked away the joy which had been sitting just barely out of my reach a second ago.

"Wot." I said. "Why do you say that, Annie?"

Annie made a wry face. "Well, I don't know how well Jumpsuit can cook now that he's dead…"

"Not dead." Said Jumpsuit, who had yet to come to terms with his fate.

Ignoring him, Annie continued. "I just think that it doesn't make much sense to have you come with me and cook when we get back when we might be gone for hours."

"But…," Screw logic! I just wanted us to be together…. "But my Annienergy will deplete if you leave." I was going to call it Hoodienergy, but my love is for the girl first and her Keckleon jacket is just an adorable bonus.

"I'll charge you up with a big hug later, okay?" She says grabbing my hands in hers and smiling sweetly at me. "Don't worry, if Mr. Jumpsuit's ghost tries anything, I'll make sure it's the last thing he does alive."

"But I'm already dead!" Said Jumpsuit, like a dope.

Pleased by his words, Annie and I both smiled at him. I fought the urge to laugh, and by the look of him he doesn't appear to have realized what he just said. Jumpsuit even stared back at us with the maybe all awareness of a Psyduck on horse tranquilizers.

"… Uh…." Though it took its sweet time in getting there, a rush of Jumpsuit's blood finally came to rest in his face, staining his face bright red. "Sh-Shut up!"

"Well that was cute!" I thought aloud. Annie then turned towards me, as if Jumpsuit's adorability had won me over to her plan. It did, but I'm still not entirely satisfied. "Alright, I guess it's alright." Seeing as how Jumpsuit is about as harmless as a toy poodle that pisses in his own face, I've got nothing to worry about from them spending time together unsupervised. "Just promise me you'll be careful, please? Don't go taking any unnecessary risks, okay?"

"Mr. Chet, you worry too much." She grumbled, eyeing me like one would a stain on the upholstery. "OK. I'll make sure that Mr. Jumpsuit's ghost doesn't get into any trouble, so don't you worry, alright?" Without even sparing me another second to respond, Annie let go of my hands and rushed off to link arms with the Ghost of Jumpsuit, who stood with bare feet on the grass like the uncultured heathen he most certainly is. "C'mon, Mr. Jumpsuit's ghost. Let's go find a Gulpin!"

"Am I a ghost or not?!" Jumpsuit had issues he needed to deal with, but there was no time for that nonsense. Annie wanted to catch a Gulpin.

"Alright, try not to have too much fun without me." I said, slowly waving goodbye to their backs as they ran off to haves their adventures without me….

…

It's been around an hour or so, and I'm most done with my cooking. I took some black pepper with what few potatoes I had left from the night before. I wouldn't have enough for more than the three of us plus Pokés, so I hope that Annie doesn't instantly befriend someone when coming back this time around.

Since I've very little to do here, I suppose now my time would be best spent giving a very short little tutorial on how to boil water out in the wilderness. The most obvious answer would be to simply hang a pot of water over a camp fire. While this can work, I don't recommend this method because it only takes longer than forever to for any water to boil.

If you're of the sort that would rather not die of starvation before the water boils, I suggest the old stone-coal method. How it works is you set fire to some wood to produce the necessary coals to boil your pot. Place three or four flat stones in and/or around your pit of coals. Spread them far enough apart so that the bottom edges of your pot may sit well just above your pit of coals. Be sure that the rocks you use are bone dry, otherwise you may end up exploding a rock. Mind, exploding rocks can be fun for parties, but when you're trying to cook and your water falls over because one of the stones you perched it on pulled a Voltorb on you.

It'd may take a while, but once you've got a boil going, you're good to make yourself some peppered potatoes…. That ended up being a lot shorter than I thought it would be….

"Damn, I'm lonely…." I told myself because lonely people talk to themselves.

With nothing else to do but wait, I hauled my single ass over to… over to nowhere in particular, really….

So there I was, all by my lonesome, waiting for my potatoes to boil over. Actually, I haven't even put the potatoes in yet. Blimey, I need to get my operations in order.

"I know I put those babies somewhere, but where?" For reasons I've already disclosed, I was talking to myself again. "Here little potatoes. Here tate'rs, tate'rs, tate'rs….." I'm so glad that no one else was around to hear me say that….

So I reached into my pack for the potatoes. Combing through the contents, I passed mine and Annie's tent, my AcroBike, a map of the region, an XBOX, and a projector television, but I just couldn't locate any potatoes.

Our food was missing, and I still had seven mouths to feed. Beginning to panic, I frantically scanned around my immediate area in the hopes that my little potatoes just fell out while everything else sat perfectly still inside my pack.

"Where did my potatoes go?" My lonely self asked. "They couldn't have just eaten themselves…, could they?" Had I been left alone to ponder over it more, I might've come up with some harebrained explanation for my missing vegetables, like a ghost possessed one to eat the rest while I wasn't looking, or something like that, but such was not to pass because of the faint chittering that caught my ear.

"…" It was faint; less than even a whisper, but I noticed it passing by me twice, thrice, maybe even four times each from both my left and my right. "Piih…!" I heard a squeak to the left of me, and the fleet skittering of something small going through the grass to my right.

It had to be a Pokémon of some kind…. I assumed while piecing things together. "And the little blighter took my potatoes!"

"Piiiih!" My less savory thoughts seem to have reached whatever little Pokémon hid so close from me that I could hear it, and it did not sound happy. "Pih prih!"

To the uninitiated, those little squeaks would probably seem like nothing worth, cute even. I know better. I know that Jigglypuffs are cute, but even a Jigglypuff can learn Flamethrower.

"Priiiih!" To me, that adorable squeaking was the sound of imminent danger.

…


End file.
